I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
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