normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
I just found a bag of teeth...
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
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