its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Randomize
