is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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