i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
i think i have two assholes
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize