How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Randomize
