kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
false alarm. still invincible.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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