Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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