I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
