Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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