I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
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