He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
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