Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize