I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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