So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
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