Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Randomize
