I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
i was born a porn star she said
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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