hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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