Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Randomize
