She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
