Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
