i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Randomize
