I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
