So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
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