when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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