How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Randomize
