Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
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