How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Randomize
