he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
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