Walk of Shame. In a state park.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Randomize
