Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
