lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
