Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
