I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Randomize