But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Randomize
