My liver just broke up with me...
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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