put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize