You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
