So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
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