So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
