Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize
