our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
