if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
