Is it normal to miss your booty call?
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
