Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
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