next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize