He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize