you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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