I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
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