At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
