Taylor Swift is so right about you.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Randomize
